A Love Letter

Oh October 1st. How good it feels to wake up, open my eyes and feel your embrace. The crispness in the air on my skin, the warm glowing sunlight reaching through the cracks in my curtains and kissing my forehead. Here I am nestled into soft blankets and feeling like today is already perfect just because it is October. 

I always feel like I come alive in October, somehow I feel more creative, more centered, more like myself than any other time of year. It doesn’t matter if it is warm and sunny, or moody and rainy, somehow it's just right and I can settle into whatever the atmosphere is. 

Candles are lit, coffee is brewed, cookies are baked. Everything smells like apples, cinnamon, and damp jackets. Somehow every moment feels a bit nostalgic and wistful.  I spend all year longing for October, and then it comes and I savor every second of it. 

And there is a silence, something calm that settles inside me. I don’t think people realize how much truly is found in silence. The quiet of October is whispering things without words. Confessions are made, a sense of “knowing” emerges.  The weight of a long pause can feel like a thick comforter caressing my body. It is a rooted feeling that can’t really be explained but I feel it, like I am crawling into the soft earth getting ready for a long sleep. October touches me in ways that nothing else can. 

It is the bliss of an afternoon sun hitting the changing leaves, the way they glitter and rustle like gold coins.  The textures in thicker fabrics, sweaters, denim, suede, knits, and fleece. Hot apple cider on my lips, as my hands wrap around a gigantic mug. I can breathe deeper and exhale a breath that I’ve been holding onto way too long. Releasing tension that I hadn’t noticed was there. 

October is kind of like losing yourself in a lover, all you can see is what is in front of you.  It takes all of your senses and fills them with wonder, leaves you satisfied, and breathless all at the same time. I feel like I can just sink and melt into each day, I can let things be, setting aside all my worries, ambitions, my longings, and fears. I don’t forget anything, it just ceases to matter for a little bit.